"Just wait until I bust out John Locke’s social contract theory after Uncle Jeffrey tries to argue about illegal immigration."

The urgent listing comes after the group was forced to sing on multiple occasions in performance without any additional musical instruments.

Gentle pranks, kind-hearted jabs, and the occasional backstabbing is all considered par-for-the-course when it comes to living with a complete stranger.

Around 10 p.m. last night, Jack went to the bathroom — the one that looks a little fancy from the outside but has the same stank as the bathrooms in Pottruck.

A thorough investigation of Moore was recently conducted, following him on a few of his outings in order to finally discover his whereabouts.

Someone call Tim Gunn!

"After I read that problem about the Pigouvian tax, I knew I was done for."

Kylie Ortega was feeling drowsy as she headed home from class yesterday afternoon.

The results are in! 10 out of 10 Penn students agree.

Johns, who reached out to the DP weeks in advance, wanted to reject Thomas in a unique way.

Why do I think Penn is the right school for me? Three words...

Penn announced on Tuesday that—despite its student body and the large amounts of land it has purchased and gentrified in West Philly—it will be building new offices in New York City and Washington, D.C.

Jacob Smith, a junior studying economics in the College, may not strike you immediately as someone who fulfilled his language requirement with Mandarin.

At 9:54 a.m., Liam Taylor (C ’20) was on his way to get a spicy beverage from Pret a Manger when, in an act of complete selflessness and humility, he held open the door for the person behind him.

Yo kid, that’s not a mouse under your refrigerator, that’s a goddamn elephant shrew, and you better take good care of it.

"Academic professionals everywhere know that the human brain performs at its best when under immense, crippling stress."

On Thursday, Penn students staff, and faculty received text notifications regarding an “adorable dog, possibly wearing a sweater and shoes at 3600 Locust Walk.” 

“There was a lot of pressure to sign the lease before November,” Rodriguez said.

From his pristine GPA to his extracurriculars, Preston Fleming (C ’21) was a guy who had school figured out. Or at least, so he thought. 

At Penn, guest lectures are often viewed as skip days for that class, or, at the very least, a nap period.