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Anders Amlie


Articles

All of Human History to Now Be Measured as Before SDT Moms Weekend and After SDT Moms Weekend

Although this event of biblical importance happened over two months ago now, its impact on human life will forever and always be marked as a measurement of excellence and achievement.


New Survey Finds Penn Students Chill AF, Move Different, Smoke That Chronic

Magill responded to the findings via IG story: "We are so back."


Joy of Extra Hour of Sleep No Match for Horrors of 4:45 PM Sunset

If this is the price we must pay, I say let the daylight go unsaved.


Students Watching Math 104 YouTube Videos Extremely Educated About Fetterman’s Campaign

They can correctly answer how long Oz lived in New Jersey, but have zero clue what the chain rule is.


Wharton Student Has Successful Coffee Chat With Parents Visiting For Homecoming

“It’s great to see the folks every now and then. It’s so important to build a strong network."


Undefeated Penn Football Team Will Now Face Alabama at Homecoming Game

Alabama’s star quarterback Bryce Young has entered the transfer portal in hopes of avoiding the menacing Quaker D-line.


Magill Spotted Hanging Sneakers Around Campus Amidst “Penn-trification” Accusations

Eyewitnesses report a shorter woman in a trench coat throwing shoes on wires in an attempt to change the campus's optics.


Hell Yeah! MERT Has Motorcycles Now

Is getting MERTed... finally cool? 


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